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Start Wearing Purple

Warsaw Mermaid Watch Out.

I recently created this and although I feel it is not 100% my style; maybe a little bit too cute and sweet, it is still undeniably me. That's my hair, my eyes, the texture of my personality, my breasts for sure *swing-lo-sweet-chariot(s)*

Still, I don't think I have ever gone out, dressed as a mermaid, green eyeshadow and tits out, and I think I might actually want to. It got me thinking about a poem I read, for the first time, almost a year ago. "Warning - by Jenny Joseph", which are life goals*. I heard it read by Helena Bonham-Carter, which made finding it all the sweeter - you can listen to that here.

Else here it is below, in all it's glory

WARNING - by Jenny Joseph

When I am an old woman I shall wear purple With a red hat which doesn’t go, and doesn’t suit me. And I shall spend my pension on brandy and summer gloves And satin sandals, and say we’ve no money for butter. I shall sit down on the pavement when I’m tired And gobble up samples in shops and press alarm bells And run my stick along the public railings And make up for the sobriety of my youth. I shall go out in my slippers in the rain And pick flowers in other people’s gardens And learn to spit.

You can wear terrible shirts and grow more fat And eat three pounds of sausages at a go Or only bread and pickle for a week And hoard pens and pencils and beermats and things in boxes.

But now we must have clothes that keep us dry And pay our rent and not swear in the street And set a good example for the children. We must have friends to dinner and read the papers.

But maybe I ought to practise a little now? So people who know me are not too shocked and surprised When suddenly I am old, and start to wear purple.

*Life Goals:

Sit on pavement when tired - Check

Eat 3 pounds of sausage in one go - check

Hoard pens and pencils - check

Swear in the street - check fuckkity check

Hey I am actually doing really well!

Tamka Out

Effy Wild Blog Along Sept 2021 - come along?

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Sep 11, 2021

I love purple.


I adore your painting...all that yummy texture! I also adore that poem--makes me crave pickle, I realise, and reminds me of being a kid and running a stick along the railings. So so satisfying! And I adore Helena Bonham-Carter. What a treat to hear her read! Thank you for all of that! And yay on the life goals so far!

Sep 10, 2021
Replying to

I am super glad you enjoyed that! I hope you get your pickle!


Unknown member
Sep 09, 2021

"Swear in the street - check fuckkity check"j Bwahahahahaha! Yes!


I first heard of this poem back around 2003 or so. It was known as the "Red Hat Society Poem". I've grown quite fond of the poem over the years. Especially when told what I should wear or what doesn't go together. I've never heard it read by Helena, I adore her so now I shall have to go have a listen. Seems I can check off a few things too.

Hoard pens and pencils ✔️

Swear in the street ✔️

Gobble up samples in the shops ✔️

I don't know if I've ever eaten 3lbs of kielbasa in one go, if I have it's been quite a long time lol

Sit on the pavement when tired ✔️

Edit to add:…

Sep 10, 2021
Replying to

You're doing much better than I am! I hope you enjoyed Helena!

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